laidoffforlife

03:34 am - im drunk and i thoyou i should be with you

with all the wrong
and all the rights
i stilll find you the one
i want to hold at night

02:57 am - hi kids

Well its been years but i thought i would but up some more shit...


When ever one knows
but i hide and now i dont even know
if we could make things work
im going to run away
im going to hide
just tel me know when its friday

the beer will take over me
the sounds and lights will easy me
just let me know you a better man
awake me up saturday night

We will drink and drive and tell the ladies no lies
we can fine a drunk chick and be
that happy guy
you know the one without VD
the day with come and i wont be sing this song
im going to run away
im going to hide
just tel me know when its friday

Sometimes the town just keeps me down
then a week goes by and im all right

Current Mood: amused

04:31 am - myspace kill LJ

well i just was looking at the lj. and saw that i don't and people i know do not....so yes its all about myspace...

11:45 pm - YES

'What will your obituary say?' at QuizGalaxy.com

Current Mood: chipper

12:08 am - me hulk

Your results:
You are Hulk

Hulk 90% Spider-Man 75% The Flash 75% Supergirl 70% Iron Man 70% Green Lantern 60% Catwoman 60% Wonder Woman 55% Superman 50% Robin 45% Batman 35%

You are a wanderer with amazing strength.

Current Mood: calm

02:51 am - this is me

ok so this has been me the last month {work, work, shows and kid}. so today i was off all 3 jobs and didn't have the kid... all and all it ws a odd day first day off for me in 20+ days....its funny because if you would have ask me to work more the 45 i would say hell NO. but now i work 60 ona slow week. this shows how old im getting and how all i think about is need this and the need for that. which as we all know i dont really need a thing, ok i could go for someone killing me......

tonight i went with my man jamie and hes band to a show in wis.. they rock it .... it was funny the are a metal/alt band and most of the other were metal... and i got my fill of metal for the year..
i learn that metal chicks have change in the las 5 years i mean i was looking aroud and talk to some that i was like wow about and yea i pull out the old for you....


i think i might go to more metal shows just for the chicks.........

Current Mood: tired

12:04 pm - harry potter

ok so i just read harry potter and i must say that was a great book.... i didnt think it would be so good but it was...... well me and aaron will be great shit going very soon we both have been writing more and more shit and talking about how this will all come together.... the band will be an arms kind of band... i think about have big mike as the dummer hes the only one that i would like to play with that is old enough....... i been work alot which is good and well i have been thnking about.. what the summer will bring... i need summer its so cold i have been thinking about going to a tanning bed place just so i can feel warm... my trip to fl is looking to be nice....
but hell its my one day off this week well half a day off i have to work 52who knows... its just to not have to work a 12+ hour day

and friday im off the only job is the show so it wil rock......


i have found that some people just dont get things

Current Mood: frustrated

02:16 am - so I got a job offer tonight from victory

so I got a job offer tonight from victory. no joke, if i want the job. All i have to do is send them a resume one monday. but i dont know if i want the job or not. i would make less money and be gone 75% of they year on tour.......



WHY CAN'T THIngs be easy ????????????????????????

Current Mood: confused

11:49 pm - so last time

Ok so time i put in this

"On a good note I have not been drink so much in the last 2-3 months ... that's just because i'm scared to see what I could do/say to some people if I do get drunk. Thing have yet to turn like i would like them too. Some people have made me mad and well let's just say I never need to hear from them again."


The thing about that is the "On a good note I have not been drink so much in the last 2-3 months " that line hurts.Why because well i have got drunk and said shit i didnt know i said and come to find out i did some thing i feel like shit about... to the point the it made me sick no joke i was up chucking, my head was killing me and well i felt like a no good person. i mean i feel like an ass 5 out of 7 day of the weak, but this made me feel so bad..... and all i can do is say..

I'm so sorry....

Current Mood: crappy

01:04 am - so this has ben me>>>>>

Well it's been so time and well thought I would let you peps know what's going down....

I been working 60+ hours a week and the bad part is im still broke........Not as broke as i could be but still broke..I have learn that life is the same now as it was 2 years ago for me, but now I have more money...

This year has started off better then the last 5 years, but with the years has come me getting older... which sucks all asssss...Next month I will be turning 26 I will be over middle age. I will be the old guy at the shows.I did start the year of with some good note's I got a
job I don't hate. I got shit set to stop doing shows, which will give me time for my band..

On a good note I have not been drink so much in the last 2-3 months ... that's just because i'm scared to see what I could do/say to some people if I do get drunk. Thing have yet to turn like i would like them too. Some people have made me mad and well let's just say I never need to hear from them again.

Love is still lost on me the more I look around the more I see that the world is more in to sex then love.... I which can be bad and can be good... The only ladies I can fine that are not think of sex are the church chick.. but me and church will never see eye 2 eye...

and on that sad thought im going to kill myself with sleep

laterss................. and keep that stick on the ice

Current Mood: but ok

12:50 am - I got it in the wrong end

Today is now know as fuck ben in the ass day..... thats what life did to me today.......


Today i hear about people staping me in the back
today i have seen what happens when you work for the man
i have seen freinds screwing over freinds in more then on way
and i have found out im just a sub in some peoples lifee

I have found out i still need to punch things aka people just to....
feel better stilll

and how good it feel to see the bone come out of the arm when you brake it......


SO 1-9-06 is now fuck ben in the ass day world has why not you ........

Current Mood: you will know pain

01:35 am - new year resolutions

12:11 am - this years new year resolutions
well its about that time to make a list of shit i will change for the new year


1. loss weight about 75 wound be cool ive done 100 in 12 weeks
2. stop looking at porn
3. get a good job that i like
4. learn new shit
5. get "laid off for life" in full afact
6. find my punk rock princess {i hope its you }
7. go on tour with a band that i know for at least 2 weeks
8. jump out of a perfect plane :}
9. learn to tell woman no===woman superbens one weakness
10. stop drinking pop
11. stop drinking beer
12. tell some girls how i feel about them
13. learn to shut my pie hole when need
14. learn not to use bad words so fucking much
15. keep my car cleaner
16. figure out what i want to do with my life
17. procrastinate less a lot less
18. read more and not just sports, write more and not just songs.
19. And learn to show more love to all my peps
20. Find a woman that i want to cuddle with on the sofa with for a long night of movies and talking. word



OK so that was last years . lets see what i did on the list
1 i did not loss that what weight but i did lose 25 which is good
2.i did stop off and on
3.i have found one that will work
4.i have learn alot this year about my self and other shit
5.i have written more sounds and i have i got song out on the net
6.i did find 2 last year but nothing that was long enough
7.i did 1 week what can i say i need money to live
8.i did not do that this year
9.i have yet to do that.... i know im a bitch
10.i have cut back to like 3 pops in a week
11... lol that was joke
12. i have done that with some a got burned in the end
13.i have yet to get that
14.i have done that one
15.lol again a joke
16. im still working on it
17.i have done that one alot
18.i have done that alot more
19.done that y because i love my people
20.i still working on that one


that was last years this years is easy


work out more
and love life the ups and downs

thats it

Current Mood: complacent

10:39 pm - what the hell happen to me

So it's been sometime, the last 15 days have been fun.... To start it off minglewood id going after me again, if you want to know2 more go look at my myspace for that. (myspace.com/laidoffforlife)

With that and work it's been fun and with x-mas it's been nice to see some friends faces... Last night was so much fun Meet up with my good man Bill and the rest of the freeport bitchs , kill abe guys. We all hope in the kill abe van and in to the subs for a show they had... On the way up we got drunk as shit. By 9:30 I was drunk by 12:30 I was good, by 1:30 I was drunk again.. on the way back to Rockford we had Bill rap for like 1+ it was good. Needs less to say it was funny as shit my sides still hurt from lol.

So in 1 hours it's going to x-mas and I must say to this day i'm still not big no it.
I did get my shopping all done on the 23th. One day sooner then last year. I did not go out and just get gift cards. I pick out shit for people this year... I don't know if I will do that again next year or not.....


And i'm still confused about " " thing they call love ...

But I hope you all have a good time this..
And I hope to fine that you all are well

with love, joy

Ben

Current Mood: confused

12:49 am - work

Well not to say i have been working.Thats about it i work 65+ hours a week then one or two nights of fun. On top of that i still have the school and the kid so life is nuts. and to make it nut i have mix signs coming my way...

i would love to be loved but i just dont know if or now it could work...but i would love to try......

Current Mood: going nuts

04:29 pm

November, 18 2005 at THE ELB $5 doors at 6:30pm
This is the End,
The Sunstreak,
The Controver Sea
,The Marseilles Shore,
These Words are Weapons

920 3rd Ave., Rockford, IL 61104
Cost: $5

HOW WE HAVE THE 21 AND UP SHOWS SORRY KIDS


ALL 21 AND UP SHOWS ARE AT
C J'S LOUNGE 300 E State St, Rockford, IL 815-964-9249
door starts at 930pm
NOV 19

This is the End
The Sunstreak
the moment
and bikes not bombs

5 bucks funn for all

300 E State St, Rockford, IL 815-964-9249

NOV 26th
C J'S LOUNGE 300 E State St, Rockford, IL 815-964-9249
doors at 930
AGAIN 5 BUCKS

Deadly NightShade
The Gallows
something worth dying for
Killing Abraham

01:30 am - Drunk word from me

I have to stop drinking



But, "fine one " why?


Well Friday night I went out drinking and I don't know how I got home..
I sent like 60 bucks, lost my cell phone and piss in my bed... Thats how drunk I was. I do not recall how I got home or why I sent 60 bucks at one bar..

I'm thinking about going to AA,and I think that when I finsh off the last bar shows for the year I might just stop that.



I feel bad for what could have happen....
I must stop, I have too...

Current Mood: exhausted

12:45 am - ups and downs of life

well folks im back to make your head hurt. we start by tell up about work.... well they cut my hours in half or thats what thye called it.. I'm down to 25 a week but its been more like 22. Which sucks all ass but hell its work. I did fine one more job to make up the numbers, so i hope it works out well... + if you didnt know we got a new places for all age show the first was weak only 80 kids. i know we can do better people..and i have some more shows coming up at cjs for all of us who love to drink and listen to good music...

Current Mood: confused

01:40 am - y

Can someome tell me why all the women over 21 i dont care for but all that are 18-20 i fine oo so good.

i mean hell i can talk more with a 20 then i can with a 21-27 year old I NEED HELP?

i do think i should see someone about it.


or just have the "sex" as many 18-20 year olds i can. or do i look for that 40-45 year old. I think could show me more then i could think.

"more words from ben "

what can i say im looking for love in a place that just wants sex..... this is life

Current Mood: lost again

11:42 pm - this week in ben

Well this week has been fun, to start off I had my boss quit and that made me have to run it all. so for the time4 being it looks like im working 6 days a week open to close ever day . Shindig was it town for 2 days it was good to see him hear some of the new song and think they are sounding good. More folk like which suits him more. The show he had at the wood was bad I think about 25 kids top.

Then the best part of the week happen when the owner of the wood flips out on my man Gar for having a band play … all they did was say something about god and she lost it.
Then she was yell shit at gar like, “you god lover asshole”, “a little promoter boy”, “you want to be singer”. This was so not called for. The man has been booking all the shows for the places in the last 1-2 months and has booked all of the shows for her for the next 2 months. The best part is that she did this plus she did not pay the bands all that was in the contract and the band that closed the night did not get paid which is what they do to all the bands they can. My man Gars band had a cd release show at the places about 2 weeks ago, had more then 130 kids show up and got 10 bucks out of it... Why ten bucks you ask, because the owner show up and took the door money and took off …This place is no good and needs to shut down.


So on that note I give a new place for all ages show in town

Live at the ELB

Friday October 28th
6:30pm

$5 or $4 with the donations of canned food.


The Killer Apathy
Punch Drunk
Bikes Not Bombs
The Moment
Killing Abraham
Hoamaloantoo


920 3rd Ave Rockford, IL 61104
Located in the basement of Emmanuel Lutheran

Email or message me for information. And please tell all your friends.

laidoffforlife@gmail.com or on myspace

Current Mood: quixotic

12:49 am - a good week

To start it off works good very good. on wens i got a new places for afaceslessname to do all age shows then i got luckey. fri i got free shake from beffrooow and on sat i found out my exs is going to have one more kid that will make her wife more of a hell. + it makes me look better for getting full custody of the kid ....

Current Mood: cheerful